Friday, September 16, 2011

Not the Post I Thought I was Writing

How do people do the whole joy in all circumstances thing?  I just don't know!  Actually, that isn't quite true.  I do not feel joyless.  I actually feel fine.  And my circumstances are not bad.  But the way I have handled things that upset me (besides praying and reading the Bible which I do do, I promise) for the last 39 years is to make snarky jokes about it.  Apparently to some, if not all, that is a form of negativity.

And really, I cannot disagree.  It just has me twisted up in a ball trying to figure out how to cope.  Now I don't expect to be ever described as a chipper, always positive person; but neither do I want to be classed as a negative person!  Who would?

Now the desire to make jokes does not mean I would laugh at anyone's pain or break someone's confidentiality to crack a joke.  Deep personal stuff, especially someone else's, is off limits.  (Not to say I've never crossed that line, but if you do see that please do smack me back in place.)

No, the problem is the little irritating things that become a lot less irritating if I can just laugh about it.  

Like the fact that when we went to Old Navy to buy khaki pants for Huckleberry while they were on sale for $10 they didn't have any in his size, but now that the pants are $14.50 there are plenty.  I didn't even think to get a raincheck when the sales girl informed me we just can't keep them on the shelves--that would be because everyone else sells them for $20.

But really, it doesn't matter.  He doesn't need a school uniform.  There has been no school all week and who knows when they will go back!  The teachers went on strike Tuesday and no agreement has yet been made.  A court judge ruled the strike illegal, but the superintendent has closed schools due to lack of staffing.  I don't really understand how it all works, and since the district is requesting a pay cut, I totally understand why the teachers are not happy.  But I do wish Huckleberry was in school.

Well, not really.  It is handy to have him home to do chores and play with Sunflower.  But if he stays out much longer I'll have to start homeschooling him.  Reading would be easy; we've gone to library twice this week, but science and social studies?

Honestly, the thing that bothers me the most about it is I was waiting to do my blog obligatory first day of school post until I knew how Middle School was going, and I still don't know!  He did not get the electives he requested.  In fact, based on the fact that if you ranked the elective choices from 1-20 with 1 being most wanted and he got number 18, 19, and 20, I think it is possible they lost his request.  

Now Huckleberry every day the first week said: They told me what to do to change classes.  I put in the request for class changes.  I talked to the band teacher who said he would make sure I got in his class.  I'll find out tomorrow.  We resisted the almost overwhelming urge to call the school and Make It Happen!  Tuesday Huckleberry was going to go talk to the counselors one last time, and if he didn't have answers, he agreed we could go in ourselves.  

But in order to avoid talking to us, the teachers went on strike.  Don't worry, we won't insist they change his classes if they are full, but the band teacher already said he could take him and he has to get out of boys choir--his ability to carry a tune is severely lacking.  We are also hoping he can get into Spanish instead of General Studies (which is apparently a class to read), but he is going to remain in Music Technology.  He is surprised, but he think it might be fun.

So far in his core classes he has played a lot of name games and written papers (including math), but it had only been 5 days, so I have no way to evaluate how it is going.  That's okay.  Oak promised Huckleberry that if he didn't start having homework soon we would find an on-line math curriculum and put him through it.  

Okay, so I wasn't really funny, but I do feel better having vented it.  On to the next topic bugging me.  Just kidding; I'll save that for another post.  But really, I am honestly confused and struggling with this concept.  Talking about Huckleberry's school did not accomplish anything.  Our circumstances have not changed and our plan of action isn't any different, but it was helpful to write it all out, get it out of swirling around in my head and onto my blog.  I don't feel the need to tell the next random people I talk to about Huckleberry's electives and the school strike (though I will commiserate with other district moms, especially if they choose to make up lost days on Saturdays.)

Is this negativity or just being authentic about what is happening in my life?  I really don't know the answer.  Certainly it sounds less negative if I finish up with a paragraph about how it isn't the end of the world if Huckleberry reads for a semester and starts Spanish next semester.  Huckleberry is certainly learning a lot of life navigation skills at school, a very good thing.  Ultimately God is in control, and I trust Him.  But sometimes that feels so obvious I don't see it as necessary to say.  But really maybe that is what makes all the difference.


No Greater Love said...

Well, I can say that I do not think you sound negative at all. I think you are saying what is going on...and in a "snarky" way. I like that. And believe it or not, I think my opinion counts for something...because I don't like negative blogs AT ALL. And as you OH SO WELL know....I L.O.V.E. yours...therefore using some form of A +B = C formula that computes to your blog is NOT NEGATIVE.

I think there is a way to write things really honestly and truthfully, without sounding complainy, and you know how to do it.

Really, I would do it too, if I was convinced I was good at it. But, I'm not convinced I'm good at it, so I just try to avoid anything that may sound complainy.

Haven't you read blogs that just sound like people are trying to get a "dig" in....but at another person's expense?

You don't do that. is that for yet another mega comment on one of your posts.

Now, I need to get back to pricing stuff for the next garage sale.


Stasha said...

Venting is a good thing. Nobody should bottle up! And sarcasm is a must in Europe so consider yourself continental :) I do hope the strike ends, everyday without curriculum is a day lost.