I really didn't mind while I was talking, but I arrived home Monday night a bundle of anxiety that she would deny us or less problematic but more annoying, insist that we have a professional psych evaluation--which would cost us in money and time. But one of the questions she asked was how you handle stress--and while trying to imply without lying that I never actually feel stress I answered: I drink a coke, I eat, I remove myself from the situation, I pray, read my Bible, call Oak or a friend.
So Monday night I was stressed. I'd removed myself from her questions, I'd talked to Oak and a friend, I had eaten dinner including the high calorie coke, but I was still just so stressed and tense. Oops, I had forgotten the most productive steps--praying and reading my Bible. I was stressing about our adoption being approved because I was assuming it was in the hands of our caseworker, agency, and the US government. I'd forgotten whose hands it is in--God.
It wasn't until I was lying awake long past bedtime that I remembered who can bring me peace. I turned to my Savior and sought His solace. I meditated on His word. I could feel His peace transform my bundle of anxiety to rest.
God's word offers us many words of promise and encouragement, but the two verses I kept repeating in my mind over and over as He enveloped me in His comfort were:
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding." Proverbs 3:4 Really mostly just the Trust in the Lord part and it was almost as if He was whispering it to me, "Trust in your Lord, for I am the Lord your God." (which is not an exact verse anywhere.)
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
So I went to sleep with thanksgiving on my lips and peace on my heart and Tuesday was a much different day. The morning cleaning was work, but not frantic, and I even cracked a few jokes during the interview--like we leave the teaching of morals to our children to Awana and Sunday School--okay, bad jokes, but still I wanted to write this post because there will be many more times in my life (like today as we get ready to go camping) where I will need to remember :
"The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, Because he trusts in You. Trust in the LORD forever, For in GOD the LORD,we have an everlasting Rock." Isaiah 26:3-4