Random Things from Our Weekend

It was a great weekend, and as soon as I finish this I'm going to sit down and watch TV, so I plan to be fast.  The pictures will have nothing to do with the commentary.

Saturday we deep cleaned the kids rooms and organized toys.  We'll see how long that lasts.  We did pack away some toys for now to limit the potential damage in the wake of Hurricane Sunflower and Tornado Sweet Pea.

Then the girls and I spent some time outside while the boys and Dad played StarCraft together.  Sweet Pea is definitely the one in the family with the most potential to buy us a house with her sports career.  The weather was beautiful.

Then we had dinner with friends.  Technically it was our Saturday night Home Fellowship Group/Bible Study/Small Group/Cell Group/Mini-church, etc. depending on what church you go to, but we call it HFG and since all but us canceled it was dinner with friends.  We missed the others and were sorry about their reasons for missing (baby with RSV and broken water heater being some of the reasons) but it was nice to only have 6 kids total instead of 22.

We did buy some hair clips for the girls this weekend.  We want a little less of Sweet Pea's hair to be bangs, but finding clips at times has been a problem.  With 25 new ones we should be able to make it a month or two.

Oh, how I loved being able to play with sunlight backlight again...and with my new lens it is fabulous!  It was the first time I filled my memory card in months.  Light is what I love about photography.

Sunday SnapDragon sang in both main services at church with a group of 6 other kids...hmmm, the rest were girls.  They sang the chorus of My Deliverer by Rich Mullins.  I enjoyed watching him so much and he really enjoyed being part of worship and was sad when it was done.  But I am glad he won't be practicing the same two lines over and over and over and over anymore.

Sweet Pea had her first communion at church (very early for any denomination) but you try having food and drink and not share it with her!  It seemed it would be better for the rest of the congregation to give her a little bit...thankfully our church serves juice, not wine.  I'm pretty sure God understands.

Today we watched the movie Elf and folded clothes.  We should probably cancel the DVD portion of our NetFlix.  I put Elf in our queue to watch at Christmas, but we sat on "Young Sherlock Holmes" for 3 months so we missed seeing it during the season.  I do admit we all enjoyed the movie, though Sweet Pea missed it due to the best nap she has had in 3 weeks.

Then Oak, the girls, and I went to McDonalds for dinner and WalMart.  The boys had dinner at home and played some more computer.  Huckleberry is almost 13 and SnapDragon 9...when did they get so old?  I don't know, but I must admit having two kids seemed like a complete breeze.  Sunflower even got to order chocolate milk since we weren't feeding her brothers.  A win-win for all. 

Warning...TMI...And Sweet Pea had her first BM in the toilet.  We had no intention of potty training at 18 months.  But she has been giving some signs she is ready.  Then today in the bath she started yelling at Oak when usually she loves baths, so he put her on the toilet and success.  We're not really sure where to go from here.  She is a year and a half younger then the others were.  Yes, I know...but we are lazy and they were slow.

On a completely different note, the lighting in the back of the yard through some sticks and brambles and under the cedar is gorgeous at 2 p.m. here.  Oak doesn't like the shot because he isn't sure exactly what her expression means, but since she followed it up with the words, "Mom!  Stop taking pictures and come in our house!" I think I know.  (The house was less than 3 feet tall, so I didn't stay long.  It was sunny but February is still pretty muddy.)

Then I spent an hour editing pictures and writing a blog post.  Overall a pretty nice, and relatively typical, weekend.  

 

Because...

...I so wanted to write a post today but I missed my sweet spot of silence. On the flipside I did make potato soup for dinner, played with the girls in the back yard, and watched an episode of Midsomer Murders.

But now the house is filled with noise and Ebee Baby and I should probably go remind SnapDragon that we are home and he should put his book down long enough to get out of the car and into the house.
  

Sometimes Feelings Don't Reflect Your Beliefs

I try not to be political here...or actually in real life either.  I tend to talk religion enough, I wouldn't have any friends if I talked politics, too.  However, I am working on a post about the need for reform and ethical adoption practices...just don't know exactly how to phrase it yet.

But, knowing I'm not political, do not take this as a post reflecting my actual view of the politics it touches on.

Right now I'm really annoyed with the military.  Generically I see so many people suffering and families struggling and falling apart because of military service the difficulties inherent in being separated for long periods, the pain of war and other undisclosed reasons.  

Personally, my friend lost her husband, another struggles with her husband's severe PTSD, and my brother met his wife...well, let's not go there.

Also, it sent Major Awesome to Korea.  Now that will be a grand adventure for him, so maybe I am more jealous of his adventure than sad, but still :(

And then yesterday, a friend told me her husband got orders Monday for Texas...not Fort Hood, another one near San Antonio.  Her husband will be a drill instructor and spend 12 weeks learning how to be mean.  Sigh.  I will miss her and her family.  Our church small group will miss them.  Their youngest is the same age as my Sweet Pea.  And I worry for their future, whether it is my right to or not.

But mostly I will miss her bright smile and cheerful, "Hello, Miss Cedar!"  Well, we have until August.  Better make the most of it.
     

15 Years

15 years ago Oak and I stood at the altar of the church I grew up in and exchanged traditional marriage vows.  4 kids, several losses, and a few jobs later, I would do it again.  I am immeasurably blessed in my partner in life. 

We would probably use the same song in our ceremony as before also though there have been many songs released since then and this song was obscure even then...but the words are what completes our promises to each other...

I Could Never Promise You
I could never promise you on just my strength alone
That all my life I'd care for you, and love you as my own
I've never known the future, I only see today
Words that last a lifetime would be more than I could say

But the love inside my heart today is more than mine alone
It never changes, it never fails, never seeks it's own
And by the God who gives it, and who lives in me and you
I know the words I speak today are words I'm going to do

(Chorus)
And so I stand before you now for all to hear and see
I promise you in Jesus' name the love He's given me
And through the years on earth and as eternity goes by
The life and love He's given us are never going to die…

(Chorus)
And so I stand before you now for all to hear and see
I promise you in Jesus' name the love He's given me
And through the years on earth and as eternity goes by
The life and love He's given us are never going to die
The life and love He's given us are never going to die
 
Words and Music by Don Francisco, 1977

We also danced our first dance to this song.  As I tell my friends, my favorite song is the song I know.
 

Turn that Frown Upside Down

Somedays it feels like everything is annoying.  I could spiritualize it a little more and say "so much is weighing heavy on my heart."  But reality is I'm just really annoyed.

Some things are actually big issues like my dad's open heart surgery (from which he is recovering very nicely), a sweet lady dying of cancer, and a friend's baby born early, but a lot of little things annoy me, too.  Like babies coloring on walls...again*...,children screeching and crying,  rain, overcast, dark skies, delayed signatures, laundry, laundry, and more laundry, yada, yada, yada.

And while dwelling doesn't help matters no one will let me crawl into the bed and pull the covers over my head.  So lets...

Accentuate the Positive...

Sweet Pea says "thank you" anytime you hand her things...though when my dad gave her a cookie she wouldn't say it until she had tasted the cookie.  Oh, it's good...now I say "thank you."

Sunflower has a very cute fake cough in the hope she'll weasel a cough drop from one of her parents.  She also informed us (after we said something about Huckleberry and chili) that "Huckleberry can't have children yet!  You have to be like 10 or 11 for children."

SnapDragon is looking forward to starting piano lessons after the new year.  And even though sometimes it is hard for him to use self-control when asked to do chores, today after seeing Sweet Pea's drawing on the door he got out the magic eraser and cleaned the door.  He also cleaned the downstairs bathroom tonight.

Huckleberry made dinner and did a ton of chores with me this evening, so now I'll go to bed with an almost clean house.

I did get to my Bible reading plan today after a week of missing it.  

Oak took the girls to Costco this evening so the rest of us could work in peace, but now they are back and Sweet Pea is blowing bubbles in her milk with a straw (which I'm sorry to say makes us all laugh because she finds it just oh so much fun!).  

I am absolutely positive that I have the best family.

How can you look at their sweet, laughing faces and not find a reason to smile?

 * The size of the drawing was quite impressive as earlier she had been brushing the walls with a hairbrush and I confess I did not quickly notice when she switched to using a pencil.

My Sweet Girls

I miss writing.  I miss my on-line friends.  I miss reading other blogs. I miss editing more than one picture at a time.  I miss sleep.

 But I am loving my life, and someday I'll tell you all about it.

Memorial Day

To me Memorial Day is often just an extra day off for my family to do things together and maybe to think about the people I'd lost in my life.  But this year, it is also the day my friend starts the ceremonies to lay her hero husband to rest...who gave his life in Afghanistan Friday, May 18th.

He willingly laid his life on the line...and paid with his life...for my freedom, for the privileges I (and other Americans) have in this country.  The freedom and privileges my Sweet Pea received on Wednesday, May 16th and SnapDragon sang about in his school performance Thursday, May 24th.

He leaves behind his wife, a baby girl (only one day younger than my Sweet Pea), and many family members and friends.

Please pray for baby K and her beautiful, sweet Mama.  Also, their extended families.  Plus the family of the other young father killed that day and those injured and their families.  Plus others who have been lost and those still serving and risking their lives...for me, for you, for us.

Words cannot adequately express grief...or thanks, but I pray that for me Memorial Day is forever now a little bit more than a day to go to the zoo.


P.S.  Thank you, Major Awesome.  We miss and love you.  Stay safe.
 

We're Here

I've always been puzzled how come people who blogged every day while in China, even those having difficult times, would come home and be silent for days, weeks, or even months.  I always figured they fell right into the swing of a busy life and didn't have time.  Well, I can't speak for them, but that isn't the reason for me.

Re-entry is hard!  Our baby is doing incredibly well still; Sunflower is probably having the roughest time adjusting emotionally and today she was almost back to herself.  Huckleberry got back on Pacific Standard Time immediately.  We are happy to be together as a family.  Even though the baby is slow at adjusting to the time (as are we), she is happy when were are up in the middle of the night.  No one is puking.  Sweet Pea likes sleeping in her crib.  All is good.

But we are so very, very tired.  It took me 3 days to even desire to write a blog post and another 2 days to actually write it.  Due to the generosity of friends and the availability of fast food we have managed to stay fed.  Our  house was clean when we arrived home and a major disaster by Sunday...only half a disaster by Monday due to motivation provided by today's first post-placement visit with our Social Worker.

So, a few thoughts that have slipped into my sleep addled brain.  I miss China--the breakfast buffet, the access to room service, the intimacy of one small room, and the easy, predictable sleeping and eating pattern that Sweet Pea fell into.  Oh wait...that isn't China, that's living in a hotel.  Loved them cleaning the room every day, too.  (I really did love China and want to go back, also.)

It is possible to carry a baby on your back in the Ergo while carrying a 3 year old on the front in your arms.  I have proven this at the airport and at WalMart (our one all family outing these last 5 days.)

Crumbs self multiply, as do toys, clothes, and dishes.

You should have rice cereal AND a can of formula in your house to come home to.

I do not remember how to form sentences that does not end on a proposition.  

It is possible to rock and feed a baby while 3/4 asleep if said baby is held safely in an Ergo (or other bum supporting front-pack).  Okay, maybe that is an exaggeration...5/8 asleep.

So we are managing.  But we are glad friends are still bringing us meals.  I'm thankful Oak has this next whole week off and flexible/part-time hours for the month of June.  We are constantly amazed and thrilled at our four amazing children.  I thank God for the wonderful people in our life, for the blessings He has given us, and for carrying us through this incredible experience.

And I'm starting the believe my mantra given to me by other jet-lagged new moms "7-10 days...it'll start to feel normal in 7-10 days...or maybe 2 weeks..."
 

The Best

Sunflower really is the most delightful little girl.  The waiter at lunch yesterday said we need to take her to Hollywood.  With the legal limits on how much money parents can skim from their child's earnings, we have no intention of helping her break into the movies, but I really do believe she could do it.

The other day she cuddled up close to me and said, "Mommy, can I sit next to you because you are my best..."

"Sure! My best what?"

"MY BEST!"

Don't worry, my head can't get too big.  Yesterday I said to Sunflower, "come sit with me...aren't I the best?"

And SnapDragon said, "Oh, Mommy, don't lie!"

He also thought that since we would be gone for Mother's Day he should give his Mother's Day present to Auntie A.  Ummm, maybe I should read even more books about attachment.

It is going to be hard to leave them for two weeks.  We will miss them so very, very much...but as Sunflower walked through the mall yesterday jumping over the black tiles and running ahead and back it confirmed our decision to leave them home.  We don't talk about it too much because it makes SnapDragon sad, but we do want them to be prepared.  Skype, here we come.

Now I'm off to the beach with my photography friends.  I'm a little nervous about sharing a house with 9 people I've only met casually before, I want to stay home with my family that I'll be missing, plus I do have some things I should be doing, but my husband said..."you paid your portion, you have to go."  I know I'll have fun, I just wish it wasn't raining.  
 

Our Weekend

Wow!  I didn't realize how depressing my last weeks of posts have been until I sat down and reread them all at once last night.  I'm thinking some of you may be wondering how this whiny girl (okay almost old woman) is going to handle having 4 kids.  If not, I'll admit I do sometimes wonder myself...

And the main answer is my husband.  

Wednesday after I got news about my grandma he came home early, took me to lunch, and let me rest.  Thursday was out to dinner and to a park.

Friday was SnapDragon's school field trip.  The best kind of field trip...a play where we all ride the bus together and sit still in seats and ride the bus back...no way to lose someone else's child and lots of cuddling with my child.  So my husband stayed home with Sunflower just so I could go.  While I was there he cleaned and did laundry all morning...stuff I should have done on Thursday.

In the afternoon he took Huckleberry and Sunflower kayaking and fishing while I was able to nap and watch SnapDragon play video games.  They even caught a fish and came home and ate it for dinner without my house ending up smelling like fish!

The weekend was more of the same.  He carpooled Huckleberry to his Saturday robotics practice while I was able to go on a photoshoot with my friends and out to lunch.  We watched Mr. Poppins Penguins as a family...a pretty cute movie really.

Sunday church and then we all deep cleaned the inside of the car...all 5 of us...it was that bad.  Now I won't be embarrassed with my kids' aunts are driving it around in a few weeks.  Then the kids favorite park and dinner out.

So all the eating out isn't doing great things for our budget and our yard is not always neat and tidy, but this family will never doubt that this man loves them.

 I know love alone isn't enough, but it sure is a fantastic foundation.
  

Good Bye, Grandma

Last Wednesday we celebrated my grandma's (on my Dad's side) 93rd birthday.

 We all had a great time.

The ladies at the adult family home my grandma was living in put on a delicious feast.

It was very festive with lots of laughter.  As usual we teased Grandma that she couldn't claim to be old until she hit at least 96...93 was only late middle age!  She always laughed at my jokes, even when she didn't understand them.

 But today my grandma died.  I am thankful for that last big party.*

After all, how many times do you get to see a wonderful lady blow out candles on their 93rd birthday ('cause lets face it...it is a little old.)

All of us will miss her.  She was very excited to be finally meeting our new little one after 6 years of waiting with us.

She was the one that my siblings and cousins and I took turns spending the night at her house.  She always brought Ding Dongs for the ones left behind.  She'd take us for ice cream and walk half way to the bottom of the falls (I was at least 10 before I realized we were going about 1/2 mile and the bottom was only 3/4 mile down...but she said her knees...)  She'd buy us rock candy and took me to my cousin's horse shows.

I remember falling out of her car on the way home from church on one of my weekend visits because I'd unlatched everything...I just bounced.  After college I would take my laundry to her house and sit and watch Wheel of Fortune, Jeopardy, and the Hallmark movie of the week while she did it for me.  (I'd been doing my own laundry since about age 8, so it was a real treat.  I'd try to help but she'd say...No.  This is what Grandmas are for!)

After I got married we would still pop on over whenever we could for a visit.  She always liked "Oak" better than my other boyfriends, she would say.  It meant a dinner out to KFC or depending on her mood Tony Romas.  Again she wouldn't let us pay...That is what being a Grandma is all about!

As the kids came we visited a little less often and gave her a little more notice of our coming, but we did see her as much as we could.  The kids thought of her as the Grandma with the dog and the fried chicken.  She'd give Oak $20 to go pick it up as she became less comfortable going out.

It has been only about a year since she stopped living on her own.  My aunt and dad finally settled her in a lovely adult family home with a "Sunflower" of their own.  We would still visit...and Minda (the home owner) would feed us.  Grandma was happy and comfortable there.


We thought she would live many, many more years.  93 is so very young.

We feel quite surprised and sad.  Yet very, very blessed to have such a wonderful grandmother in our lives for such a very long time.  Grandma, we will miss you.


*Though we had visited her only a few weeks before and IF we'd been in China my sister who hadn't seen her in 2 1/2 years would have been here for the party...but...
 

This Week

It seems like everyone is in China but us.  Last week knowing everyone was getting their travel acceptance and booking tickets for April was very, very hard.  This week, while I still struggle with anger at my agency, it is kind of exciting!  So many families are being formed this Easter weekend and in the upcoming weekends!  So many children who have been without their parents long enough will finally meet their family!

Obviously adoptions happen all the time, but these are people I "know" via my facebook groups and adoption forums.  It adds a little extra happiness to the process.  I love it.  It gives me something to do while I wait for our time to travel...less than 4 weeks away :)  We also got an update on Sweet Pea on Tuesday which was quite exciting...4 new pictures and the answers to several more questions.  Yeah!

I have had other things to do this week besides just follow other's travels.  The boys were home for Spring Break and though I hadn't planned ahead because I REALLY, REALLY thought we'd be in China, we did find ways to fill the week.  

MOPS and Bible Study, as usual.  Going out for ice cream (don't judge, but apparently we don't do that enough.  They thought it was the BEST THING EVER!)  Prairie Days at the Historical Society Museum.  My Grandma's 93rd birthday party.  The Pacific Science Museum.  Dinner at the Cheesecake Factory.  Dying Easter eggs with cousin L and Auntie J.  They're going Kayaking fishing this afternoon (which is when I'll finally have time to work on all the pictures I took this week!).  And then the best day of the year...Easter Sunday...because...

Christ is Risen!  He is Risen Indeed!

We were talking to Sunflower about Easter and why we celebrate it, but she got very, very sad when we mentioned that Jesus died.

"But Jesus and God TAKES care of us?"

"Yes, and He died in order to take care of us...to take care of our sin.  But then He rose again!  Now He lives!"

"Well, that is REALLY EXCITING!"
 

Bike Ride

Almost 6 years ago we took this picture to submit with our adoption paperwork (dossier for those in the know.)

We needed to have a picture of us doing something we enjoy doing together as a family.  Yesterday I was not carrying the tripod...

All I could think as we were walking was this would have been even better with Sweet Pea on my back in the Ergo...or Oak's back.  Supposedly she weighs a lot.

Today, so far, has been a better day.  Thank you for the encouraging words.  They do help.  I could have used some this morning when SnapDragon was late to school because I went the wrong way on the way.  I went the route needed for my McDonald's playdate later and not school which cost us 10 minutes.  Really we need May to come!  I cannot continue to operate on half a brain.
 

Everyone Should Have a Shower

I am so very, very blessed.  Not only have I met some great people on-line, but my real life friends and family are awesome, too!  Yesterday my friends had a shower for Sweet Pea and I, and it was fantastic!  I felt so showered with love (and gifts) and I just know our baby will have a warm welcome here.  

I've always known that people were happy for us and looking forward to our adoption working out, but you hear so many sad stories about people thinking of adoption as less or not even acknowledging you've added to your family, that it just makes my friends' and families' excitement and joy all that more special.  And when I answered a question with "we do know the answer to that, but it is part of her story so we are keeping it for her to share or not to share..." they all nodded sagely in agreement.  It might be my imagination, but I feel at that moment they all just "got it" a little more. Now their own protective instincts toward our child are a little higher because they put our child's well-being before their own natural curiosity with love and grace.  I am not surprised by that response, but I am so very pleased and it touches me greatly.  Sweet Pea is loved so very much...and not just by the 5 people who live in my home.

We ate, played a few games, ate, prayed, ate, opened presents and almost the whole time talked about Sweet Pea, the last few steps until we get her, and how our travel in China is expected to work.  I loved answering the questions (and maybe a little bit loved being the center of attention) but mostly just loved being with my friends, smiling, and happy as a group.  It is something I will treasure forever...and the presents were fun, too!

One of my friends whom is also really into photography took pictures so I could just enjoy...though now I'm thinking she wasn't in a single one!  That's not good...so maybe at some point when I have a chance I'll share some, but no time now!  It was wonderful that she did this for me as pictures are so important to me...and finally a shower where I'm not 9 months pregnant in the pictures!  (Though my weight is bleh still...)

Then after the shower a few of us stayed on until our husbands and families showed up for our evening HFG (Home Fellowship Group; basically small group, cell group, mini-church, life group, etc.)  We only started the group about a month ago, but it is the perfect fit for our family and I LOVE the other families in the group.  So very thankful for my friend for starting the group, hosting it, and including us.  

I went home with my heart full.  Now we have a full day of celebrating Huckleberry's birthday and getting ready to leave for China in 16-18 days...as long as we get our TA in 2-14 days!